Somewhere Only We Know
by HerNamewasAlice
Summary: Maybe she should stop. She's not supposed to be with him. He's done horrible things. And maybe she shouldn't stop. If he was Judas, then Judas never looked so good before. (Sweetest Friend Ship Story).
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Full on Sweetest Friend story. Read the ending author notes for more of an explanation. I did the story early because I wanted to write Sweetest Friend lol.  
**

* * *

**Chapter One**

* * *

The helmet. Red and glossy. Menacing eyes of white slits, lined and hollowed by black, almost as a frame for a photo. There was no mouth to the mask and all she could wonder were the thoughts that were in his mind. She couldn't help but to be drawn to the new figure. She dropped what she was doing and stood there in the middle of the mat and stared. Everyone did. His clothes - his costume, it was different. It was black and form fitting, with a Batman insignia of blood red. Over his clothes, he wore a dark brown leather jacket. Who was he? Why was he here? She had never seen him before in her life. Diana and Batman were walking with him, side by side, having him in the middle - as if he was a prisoner. Handcuffs. There were handcuffs on him. They weren't regular handcuffs. They were the ones that they used on superheroes. If you even make a slightest move, the handcuffs will shock you. The more you move, the more the pain grew.

Red Hood.

Everyone knew didn't know much about him due the adults keeping the news a secret but all the team members knew one Hood - he was the one that was the closest to killing Batman.

He felt her. Her eyes on him. He turned to her direction - she was sure that he was looking at her. He must have. The thoughts - thoughts in her head - she was wondering what he thought of her. She didn't blink until he went to the other room with them. "Why is he here?" she whispered to Barbara. "Who is he?"

"He was Robin before the current Robin. There are three Robins. Nightwing was the first. And the current one is the third."

"Really?" her skin was tightening. She thought...she thought he died. He died before she joined the team so she knew nothing of him. He died four years ago. So...so the speculations...the speculations were true. He did come back to life. What was it like? To die? What was it like to come back?

"Batman captured him last night. They're going to try to convince him to stop what he's doing. And they're going to try to make him turn over a new leaf," Barbara breathed.

"You-you think...that he will?" she asked.

"I don't know."

* * *

They took him to a room with only walls and a table and two chairs. The chairs were across from each other. There was a dark glass screen off to the side - it was an interrogation room. Bruce unlocked the handcuffs and slammed him down to the chair and tied his arms to the armrests. He could feel their eyes on him - eyes of disappointment and anger. Diana went up to him and grabbed him by the helmet. Jason laughed to himself. "Try all you want but it won't work. The helmet is voice activated. It won't get off until I say so."

"Unless I break it," Bruce snapped.

Jason crossed his arms and leaned back into his chair. "Try it," he mocked. "Crack my skull open if you have to, _Pops_."

"Stop it," Diana grabbed Bruce by the hand before he could strike him. "He's trying to provoke you."

Bruce moved back and exhaled. "Jason," he cleared his throat. "Listen to me. You need help. You're not well. I don't know what you have gone through but I know it must have been a traumatizing experience. You need help and we can help you if you let us-

"And here is the part where you try to make me change my ways," he scoffed. There was nothing wrong with him. The only difference was that he wasn't Bruce's boyscout anymore. "I don't need help. Not from her and especially not from you."

"You were a good person," Diana clutched Jason's hand. She frowned. The Lazarus Pit's effects..she didn't know how strong they were...he was a different person. She remembered the first time she met him. He was only ten years old, going on eleven. He was so scared but he was also determined to keep people safe. "You were a good boy-

"That boy died," Jason said bitterly. "Along with promises of never leaving someone."

Bruce swallowed hard. "I know you feel that I abandoned you but it's not that. It's not that at all, Jason-

"I don't want to hear it," Jason gritted his teeth. He didn't want to remember...and yet the memories made him who he was. "I hear all the crap from you for the past year that I've been alive. Now, let's talk about something new," his tone became light and mischievous. "The blonde girl in the Wonder Girl shirt - is she a virgin? Because I love virgins. They're easy to manipulate."

Diana attacked him in an instant.

* * *

He's there. In the training room...as if he knew she was going to be there. She always liked to go to the training room early in the morning, before anyone else. He was there, before her, lifting weights. His face is bare, his dark black hair pressing on to his pale skin. Shirtless. He was shirtless, his muscles rippling. Sweat was trickling down to his abs. Blood pumped to her cheeks. She shouldn't be here. Ever since he joined, all her friends kept warning her to avoid him for he had a wicked temper. She tries to leave but he notices her. "Hey," he says, settling the weights aside. She expected him to threaten her to leave - the thing he did with anyone that interrupted him when he was exercising but he doesn't.

He's standing there, in front of her. She couldn't breathe. He was even more handsome up close with those playful brown eyes. She was never fond of brown eyes but there was something about his eyes, something...something that made her shiver. "What's your name?" he asks, wiping his forehead from his sweat with a towel. He's smiling at her. She never felt so intimidated before. There was something about his smile. Something...almost...dangerous. He was dangerous, she knew. He was dangerous but she didn't know that danger could feel like this...so...riveting. Exciting.

"Wonder Girl," she said quickly. She shouldn't be around him. Diana made it clear for her not to be around him. Diana told her that he was no good -that he was nothing but trouble - that he was a killer...but no one told her how good looking he was.

He laughed. "I know but I mean what's your real name?"

She doesn't say anything. For someone she was told to stay away from...he was kind. Unexceptionally kind. His voice - his posture - his choice in language in tone, it was inviting. Charming. She couldn't help but to be transfixed. She's never met anyone like him before.

"I thought only the Bat family were secretive about names. How about if I tell you my name, you tell me yours?" he chuckled. "My name is Jason. Jason Todd."

"C-cassie," she stuttered. She does everything to avoid looking at him. "My name is Cassie," she clarified.

"Cassie?" he scratched his chin and smiled. He had this smile - this kind of smile that had hints and traces of a smirk. He had this face - this face that was made for a smirk - he had this smirk mouth - a smirky mouth that you just wanted to kiss. No scratch that. He had this kind of smirk that you just _had_ to kiss. "That's a cute name."

Her cheeks reddened. "Oh - um...I better go, I should-

"No, stay," he coaxed. "Go on and practice. Don't ruin your routine because of me. I will stay in my corner and I won't say a word."

She tried to think of an excuse to leave but she couldn't. Instead, she goes to the far end and stretches her body in silence. She's reaching for her toes but then she sees something glimmering. Glimmering red. His helmet. It was there, in the corner.

"You like it don't you?" he said, knowing what she was looking at.

"Your helmet is nice. It's very pretty." She paused, realizing that she called his helmet pretty. Cassie turned red. "Sorry - I didn't mean to-

"It's okay," he chuckled. He snatched his helmet and showed it to her. "Here, have a better look, Cassie."

Her fingers slowly traveled to the base of his helmet. Smooth. Cold. Slick. Fascinated. She was fascinated. There was something about his helmet. It wasn't like the others. It molded to his face. He stared at her once he was sure that she was transfixed. Her eyes are shining and her mouth was curved in interest. He blinked slowly, taking a mental image of her. "Wow, did you make it?" she asked, unable to suppress her curiosity.

He nodded. "Yup."

"How long did it take you to make it?"

Jason stared at the ceiling and bit his lip in thought. "Hmm... about a couple of weeks. Making the helmet took about two weeks but it took a long time to install some gadgets and controls."

"Does it got hot when you're wearing the helmet?"

"Really hot but you get used to it after a while."

"Are you...are you joining the team - or er rejoining?" It was a foolish question for she and the others knew that he was in the team again but she wanted to know if it was by force or his choice.

"I'm rejoined but I'm under parole," he laughed. She liked it - the way he carried himself. He was mellow, in touch with himself, something she never seen with any person at all. "It's kind of funny and hypocritical. They say that I can't be Robin again and also they don't want me to be Red Hood either. So I don't know who to be. It's alright though. If it means that I get to be near cute girls like you then I don't mind," he gave her wink.

Out of shock, she dropped his helmet -...on his foot. "I'm sorry!" her voice nearly broke out. It must have hurt. It sounded like it did. There was a loud cracking sound. She wasn't sure if the helmet broke or his foot. "I'm very sorry - I-I-

"It's okay," he said calmly. "Just a little crack but I can fix it." Jason picked up his helmet and put it on her. He adjusted it, brushing her blonde hair to her back, smoothing her locks gently. "I think you look better with the helmet than me."

No response.

Amused. He was amused. He whispered something to her but it was so soft that she couldn't hear. He took off the helmet from her and pressed his lips close to her earlobe. "You better go, Ms. Warden is giving me a death glare at the moment."

"Ms. Warden?" she turned around and found Diana, standing there with disapproval. Cassie frowned. She never seen Diana give her that look before. "I better go," she whispered to him.

"It's nice, knowing someone "my age." I hope to see more of you some time."

* * *

A killer. He was a killer. He's psychotic. Unstable. Cassie knew all of this but she couldn't help but to be attracted to him. There was something about him. She's been with a couple of guys but all were just the same. They were clean cut and dry while him - he was something else. Unpredictable. Wild. Exciting. He made her heart race and make herself lose control of her tongue. "I forbid you from being near him," Diana muttered.

"Why?" she raised her eyebrow.

"He's a bad influence. He's disrespectful. Rude. I will not allow you to be near someone like him."

Cassie frowned. Something happened, she knew. A few days ago, Diana was reasonable and level headed about the issue with Jason Todd. "The other day though you told the team along with me, that we should treat him well. Like he's no different. You told me that despite what he had done, we should give him a chance and help him redeem himself. You said-

Diana pulled her inside of her car. "Things change," she said as she drove off. "And I will not have my protegee even making the slightest contact with him."

"I talked to him," Cassie said in a meek voice. "And he doesn't seem that bad. He's really nice and swee-

"You should hear what he told me the other day," she gritted her teeth. The image of moments before - what she saw - the image of seeing her protegee with his helmet on and being touched by him - Diana wanted to beat him down. Cassie - Cassie was like a daughter to her. She shook her head and slowed down. "He's manipulative. He's no good Cassie. Stay away from him."

"But-

"Do I make myself clear?" her voice was hard. She didn't want anything to happen to Cassie. Diana knew the person that Jason became. She knew his type. He would lie and manipulate Cassie and hurt her. Cassie was a bright girl, an intelligent girl but like all smart and sweet, trusting girls that encounter guys like him, they lose themselves. Lose themselves to his charm. His smoothness. His lies that sounded like sincerity. She was too kind and innocent to be hurt.

She wanted to speak out. Cassie wanted to tell Diana to give him a chance and to trust her judgement. She wanted to but Diana had this tone - this tone that told everyone that she didn't want any argument. The tone - it was a tone for no discussion but a simple one word answer. "Yes," she told Diana the answer that she wanted to hear but it meant nothing to Cassie. Diana was being unreasonable. Cassie believed in getting to know someone before labeling them. She knows that he's done things but he's in the team again because he wants to change. He wants to be better.

But how can he be better if people weren't giving him a chance? She doesn't know what to think about him. She wants to get to know him before judging him but Diana was fencing her in a cage. The others, they were treating him like a disease.

He joined the team only a few days ago and people were intimidated by him and did everything they could to avoid him. The adults' treatment with him was far worse. They were treating him as if he was a prisoner. As if he was some Judas.

Cassie bit her lip and submerged herself deeper into her inner thoughts.

If he was Judas, then Judas never looked so good before.

* * *

_**To be Continued...**_

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**A/N: so what do you guys think? For this story it's a little different. It's going to be half story and half drabbles. For story chapters they'll be labeled "chapter one, chapter two, etc." And if it's a drabble, it'll be labeled "drabble one, drabble two." I did this because they are connected to the little universe in the story.  
**

**Please review**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Fun fact, this story was going to be called "Judas" but I felt it was too juvenile so I changed it. It's named after Keane's song, "Somewhere Only We Know" XD This chapter is written a little bit differently on purpose to show emotions that cannot be seen and show transition. ENJOY :D**

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**Chapter Two**

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_He's done things. __Brought fear. Taken lives. There's nothing in him but hatred. Anger. The need to kill. To paint himself with blood. When I try to talk to him, nothing seems to register in his mind. He doesn't seem to care, not even himself. Don't go near him. Whatever you do don't. His behavior is destructive. On others and himself. The most disturbing thing is think he enjoys it - the pain, to feel something. I'm not sure if he's even human anymore._

The voice, the ongoing wretched voice was playing in his mind again. Over and over, like a track and he couldn't make it stop. His hands were over his ears, his body on the floor - his legs trembling from the words. He wanted the voice to stop. He wanted everything to stop. _There's nothing in him but hatred. Anger. The need to kill. _He closed his eyes and counted out loud in a steady pace, one...two...three. "Make it stop," he breathed to no one in the room he was kept in. "Make it stop," his voice rasped. _When I try to talk to him, nothing seems to register in his mind. He doesn't seem to care, not even himself. _ "Make it stop." _I'm not sure if he's even human anymore._

Jason screamed and pried open a box of razors - tearing the plastic container open - a dozen sharp blades spilling on to the ground. The voice, the voice in his head, it was Bruce. And he didn't want to hear his voice. He didn't want to be constantly reminded that he was a failure. He didn't. He picked one up with two fingers and sliced the inner part of his right arm - cutting it, as if following a dotted straight line, cutting his whole arm, down the middle. He lifted the blade slightly and cut his arm in another direction - deeper - splitting everything in sight.

...

They found him - Bruce and Dick, they found him, passed out in his room - on the floor with blood trailed from his body.

...

_Doctors:_

_He's not breathing._

_He cut a major artery._

_Mr. Wayne, it wasn't a suggestion. You have to leave. We have to operate on him and people are not permitted during the operation. You have to leave. Now. You're only making it worse on yourself. Mr. Wayne, the other doctors and I will do the best we can to save your son. _

_Hold Mr. Wayne down, he's going hysterical. Hold him down, take him outside. Mr. Wayne, you have to calm down. I know you're upset but you can't be here - I understand he is your son - I know, I know and you don't want anything to happen -but listen to me, you can't be here. You can't. Being in your state and condition is not good for you or him. You have to be calm. Mr. Wayne, wait in the waiting room. You have to leave. Take him outside._

_No guarantee. There's no guarantee that he'll be alright. He cut a major artery but you found him before it was too late. Mr. Wayne, you have to leave now. We'll send you when we're done. Mr. Wayne, you have to leave. We'll do the best we can._

_Mr. Wayne, we'll do the best we can.  
_

_Mr. Wayne, we'll do the best...we...can._

* * *

Wires, wires were attached to him. Gauze and medical tape was on his flesh, to hold in several needles that were injected into his system. There was a breathing mask on him. He heaved, his mind constricting - his body tightening. His eyes - they adjust and he sees him, Bruce. He sees him. Bruce. Jason frowned and cursed underneath his breath.

"You've been out for almost a week," he dryly said.

Jason's eyes was no emotion in Bruce's face, just boredom and indifference. Bruce, he didn't care for him. He never cared for him. He never did. Maybe...maybe Bruce wished he was dead again. "I'm glad my pain didn't affect you one bit," he spat out, tearing the breathing mask from his mouth.

"Jason-

"You're the reason why I did it," he grinded his teeth together. His eyes were bloodshot and his jaw was starting to twitch. "I hear you, in my head. Your voice - your stupid goddamn voice. Putting me down - making me feel like garbage - and and I couldn't take it, I had to forget. It's sad really because it didn't take you too long for you to forget about me."

"You think I don't care for you - you're wrong, Jason-

"Why did you do it?" Dick demanded, facing towards his little brother. His face was pale white, shadowed and hallowed by discoloration and creases.

"Do what?" Jason smirked.

"Try to kill yourself," Dick muttered. "You scared the shit out of me - find you on the ground -

"I didn't try to kill myself," he laughed to himself. "I tried death once, didn't like it." He said it as if death was a drug. " Never going back."

"Why did you cut yourself?" Bruce asked.

"What do you think?" he snapped at them. "You think I'm _happy_? Well I'm not. I'm not happy," tears were streaming out of his eyes. "I haven't been happy for the past year I've been revived. You don't know what it's like - to come back and find out there's nothing for you - nothing saved for you - but replaced. So why should I be happy? That you forced me against my will to be in Young Justice - to be watched twenty four seven - to be treated like I'm nothing but a piece of filth? That- THAT I'm some monster? And you have the nerve to think I was happy? I'm supposed to be...I'm supposed to be nineteen by now," Jason moved his head and swallowed. His voice was low. "I'm supposed to be in college - supposed to be with my friends - I'm supposed to be having the time of my life - not sixteen years old and trying to get back the years I missed while I was dead," his voice broke out. He died when he was fifteen years old and he was dead for three years, until last year. "I'm supposed to be Robin still."

"You know you can't," Bruce said.

He closed his eyes and cursed, screaming, spitting out words of anger and hatred. "I know," he said once he was calmed down. "I know."

"You can't do this Jason," Dick's eyes lowered. "You can't go back and forth to the past. I know you're going through something that none of us can understand but it's you that's making yourself miserable. You can't dwell on things you can't change. You have to make the best of what's here, what's left."

"Nothing makes me happy."

Dick scoffed. "I know you Jason, I know you more than anyone. You're still here. You had so many chances in the two weeks you've been here but you didn't escape. You didn't leave. You stayed. Why did you? Unless there was something or someone you liked."

* * *

_Doctors:_

_The best thing to do is talk to him - bond. Have him under extensive care and have him get help. Talk to him, but more than that, also listen. Listen to what he has to say. Try to find the source of the problem, talk it out. If you don't know what to do, don't forget that there are people to help. Relatives. Guidance counselors. Therapists. Doctors. _

_He's still in shock, you have to be gentle with him. Make him feel good about himself. Praise him. Remind him that he is not alone and that there are many people he can go to. Surround him with things he is fond of and likes to do.  
_

_Remind him he is not alone._

_That he has someone._

...

"No," Diana bit her lip. "No, Bruce, that's final."

"I know how you feel about him but he seems to be happy when he's near her."

"He's going to hurt her. He's going to take advantage of her. I know it. I just know it. I'm not going to hurt her for his sake of self enjoyment. I know your relationship with him is strained and you want to fix it but I'm not going to let Cassie get hurt."

"I know him, he's not going to hurt her."

She shook her head. "He will."

"He won't. He never had before."

...

His fingers, his blotchy fingers, along ivory piano keys, pressing along a melody. The music he was playing was soft, melancholy. _Hold me until I sleep. Hold me until I sleep._ The music seemed to speak out in those words. _Touch me, wipe the tears away. Hold me until I sleep. Hold me until I sleep. Can you make the pain go away? Hold me until I sleep. I know you can't stay. Hold me until I sleep. Hold me until I sleep. Can you make the pain go away? _Cassie watched him from a distance, watching him concentrating with full focus in playing. His eyes were furrowed, no expression on his face but a curved mouth. He seemed to go along with the music. He played beautiful, Jason. Never missing a note. Flowing. Livid. Beautiful.

Her eyes fluttered.

She remembered.

"You still play beautifully," she said, slowly sitting beside him on the piano bench. "Always had," she whispered.

"Do you finally remember me?"

Cassie nodded.

He chuckled and continued to play. "That's good." She stared at him, his hands - his arms. His hands were wrapped in bandages and gauze. And his face - his face seemed so withered. "You always liked it when I played the piano."

"I don't remember much but I remember that." He played beautifully. Soothing. Soft. Sweet. Bitter. Sound.

"It's alright," he shrugged. "You were young when we met. Of course I was young too. You were six or seven, I think. And Diana brought you over to the Cave. You were separated from your mom from an attack, so she took you until she found your mom. And while she went looking, I watched you for a little bit. Do you remember that?"

"Somewhat, the only thing I remember at the age was first meeting Wonder Woman," she laughed. Her eyes sparkled. She cherished that day when she met Wonder Woman -saved by her too. Ever since that day, Diana had been her second mother since. Never left her. Getting lost, being separated from her mother - she did everything she could not to remember.

He smiled. "You were really cute, I remember, and still. I did everything I could to make you happy during the three days you were at the Cave. I played games with you, remember?"

She frowned and shook her head. Her cheeks were red, red from the memories surfacing in her mind. "I'm sorry but my memory's kind of blurred, but I remember, we used to play fight." She only interacted with him for three days when she was little and yet he seemed to remember every detail.

Jason stopped playing and laughed. "You always thought you could beat me so I let you win and pretended to be hurt."

"I remember that," she laughed. "I was very gullible - of course I was a little girl then and I would run to M'gann and make cookies with her and give you one."

"You make better cookies than her," he winked.

"You're different now. I guess that's why I didn't recognize you."

"People change," he said simply."But not a lot of people die and come back."

"What was...it like?" her voice was low.

"It's somewhat nostalgic," he tilted his head and closed his eyes. "It's like you're sleeping - and you know you're dead and you want to wake up but you can't and strangely, you don't. The place, it was nice. Amazing really. I won't describe it as heaven because I don't believe it but it was close."

She swallowed. "Do you want to go back?"

"Sometimes, when I'm sad." She stared at his arms and touched them. A pulse, she can hear a pulse but his body, it was like cardboard - like it was still dead. He moved his hand away and touched her shoulder. "But most of the times, I don't. When you're there, you're not living. You're just in a world of nothing. So right now, I'm doing all the living I can. What do you think of me? Do you think I'm bad?"

"No. Just lost."

...

Diana found them, on the couch. Jason had his arm around her and she was asleep while he was watching television. He was smoking, carelessly flicking the cigarette's ash. "Put that thing out," she gritted her teeth together, trying to hold her temper. "You're in a house - _your_ home for that matter."

"Nothing happened, if that is what you're wondering," he didn't take his eyes off the screen. Jason went along smoking, exhaling the smoke.

She pulled him by the wrist. "I told you to behave."

"You weren't specific enough," he crookedly smiled.

She breathed heavily. "Ja-

"You can't take a joke can you?" he laughed. He pulled away from her and made his way to the kitchen. She followed him, muttering words to get her by from striking her. Jason leaped on the counter top and reached for a plum.

"NO," she crossed her arms.

"You're scared aren't you?" he threw his cigarette and took a bite of the purple fruit. "You're scared that I'm going take her away aren't you?"

No answer.

He snickered and threw the rest of the plum into the trashcan. "Well guess what? I'm not going to take her away. She's not going anywhere. I don't want her. So there's nothing for you to worry about then."

* * *

"You haven't taken her yet?"

"No," he scratched his head. He switched his cellphone on to his other ear, his good ear as he stacked slices of meat and cheese together. "Not yet Roy."

"Why not? You've been there for about a month. I figured with your big ego you would have taken her in a second and leave the hell hole. Why haven't you done anything?"

Jason smirked to himself and stacked layers of lettuce and onions and tomatoes. He knew that Roy was pissed off. He knew Roy - the real Roy Harper for only three months since he had been alive but they became close friends ever since. "It takes time. She's not like the others. She actually has a brain and it takes time to convince her. Besides I'm not sure if she wants to tag along."

"Don't say tag along," Roy mumbled. "You make it sound like a freaking field trip to Candyland."

He shrugged and finished topping the sandwich by putting on the final slice of bread along with strips of avocado and bacon. He took a big bite, "Okay, join then. Doesn't matter though. It means the same thing one way or another."

"So do you think you could convince her? I know her and she's a little version of Ms. Warden."

"I can convince her," Jason wiped his mouth and took another bite of the sandwich.

"You never really explained why you wanted to take her."

"You sound like you don't want her."

"No," he blurted out. "It's not that. She's alright. She's dorky though but she's nice. When I was there, she used to cheer me up - bring me cookies, help me practice, and help me change out of my shirts -" he paused and changed the subject. "She's a good fighter," he stiffly said. "But it's like taking Superman and making him work with Lex Luthor. So why do you want her to go?"

"Do you need to know?" He sat down on the table instead of a chair.

"Yes."

"I really don't know really," he shrugged. "I just want her along. I kind of have a soft side for her."

* * *

_**To be Continued...**_

* * *

**A/N: YES, that's the answer for your question. The story is going to have action and plot, not just a build up of romance. Yes on killing the Joker. And when I mean plot, like actually action X)  
**

**This somewhat changed style of writing was used for this chapter and I'm sorry if people had trouble following along.**

**So for the question about Jason's age. Jason died when he was 15, been dead for three years, been alive for a year and a half already. Yes, this story takes place a year after season two. He's "16" by that matter but is supposed to be 19. Cassie is 16 too. And Roy's "17" by frozen terms.**

**Jason met Cassie when he was either nine or ten years old when she was six/seven. Back then they had an older brother/young sister friendship for the three days they interacted.  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Some of you guys were asking about the song in the last chapter and I want to say that the song is an original song of mine. Anyway, enjoy the new chapter! Thanks for reading!**

* * *

**Chapter Three**

* * *

Little innocent girl comes by with a full set of hips and small perky breasts - he usually fell for those girls. A fetish of his, was more of an accurate description. Those types of girls, they weren't difficult or cruel like the girls who looked like models or the bombshells you craved at bars. Girls he liked were kind and sweet - easy to get along - to connect, and were very easy to manipulate. But it wasn't the case with Cassie. It's been almost two months but he had barely gotten underneath her skin. And it frustrates him - because he knows she's attracted to him, and he's attracted to her - it should be simple, quick, but it wasn't. As each day went by, he was losing more and more of his patience.

He never got anything he ever wanted in his life but this time, this second chance - this second life, he will get two things that he wants. Killing the Joker and Cassie. He's going to make sure of it.

...

She hears something - sounds of rocks bouncing against her window - hitting and scraping. Cassie raised her eyebrow and peered outside - Jason. He was throwing rocks at her window. His eyes caught hers and he stops throwing the rocks. A smug look appears on his face, his hands in his pockets. "What are you doing here?" she says after she slid up her window.

He shrugged and gave her a lopsidded smile. "Don't know really, I wanted to see you that's all."

Blood rushed to her face and she quickly turned around for a second to let the redness die out from her pale face. "It's late Jason. You shouldn't be out here." She couldn't help but to smile. He was aggressive and hostile to everyone - everyone except her. He was civil and he was always relaxed.

"Do you want to go to the shooting ranges with me?"

Her skin tightened. "What?"

Jason chuckled and shifted side to side. "There's an indoor shooting range nearby. It's not that late, it's only eight thirty and the shooting range doesn't close until ten. So do you want to come?"

"You know Diana wouldn't like it."

"She doesn't like a lot of things does she?"

Cassie grinned. "No."

"Well, I know for a fact she's not home," his chocolate brown eyes gleamed with mischief. "Would telling you that make a difference?"

His eyes - his soft, laid back eyes - they were pulling her.

The shape.

The color.

The richness.

They were pulling her.

"Okay," she blurted out. She turned away and went to her closet. "Just let-let me get my jacket."

A crooked smile appeared on his face.

* * *

Being here - in a shooting range - it was...terrifying. She never been here before, let alone hold a gun. She held on to the gun and watched him shoot first at the target. The target was a parchment of paper with a printed on silhouette of a body, with lines over to show the crucial points. The target was several feet away from him but he hits every point effortlessly. She shouldn't be surprised. His main weapon was a gun. He's shooting, loading and shooting - all what seemed to be in a blink of an eye - each hit, never missing. "Wow," she awed in amazement. "You're good."

He smiled and set aside the gun. "Your turn."

Her mouth dropped slightly. Cassie could hear her heart racing. "Uh-um, I really don't know how to do this," she blushed.

Jason laughed. "It's okay, I'm a pro. I never miss. I'll teach you." He goes behind her, gripping her arms - holding and guiding her as if she was a puppet and he was pulling at her strings. "Hold it up and level," he whispered to her ear. "Fix your posture," he moved her shoulder back. "Relax okay?" he fixed her posture, his hands nearly groping her tense skin. She feels herself - she feels herself melting into his hands, his strong hands. "Focus on the target, let's go for the heart. And now pull."

She does so- the bullet going out like fireworks on the Fourth of July.

The bullet hits the target, without a doubt.

"Wow," she blinked, her body shaking. The adrenaline was rushing - spreading all over her body, leaving her numb. Shooting - it was terrifying and yet- exciting - riveting - thrilling. Shooting - she still couldn't believe she pulled the trigger - it happened so fast. It was so quick - so great.

He placed her gun down and hold her. "Yeah, the first time shooting is kind of scary but you get used to it."

"Now I see why you like using a gun," she feebly said.

...

They stayed there until it was time to close.

...

"Did you like it?" he said as he started his car.

"I like it but it still scares me when I pull the trigger," she bit her lip. She feels inferior next to him. He was talented. Skilled. Fearless. Cassie wasn't any of those things. She was still learning and she was still uncoordinated.

"It takes time to get used to it. Do you want to practice by pulling on my _trigger_?" his voice was low.

Her eyes moved away from his face and to her hands. The tone in his voice - she knew what he was implying. "Uh um - I -uh," there was no right answer to his question. "I-uh-uh-ummmm..-um-

He chuckled. "You're cute."

Nervously, she blinked her eyes. She opened her mouth but nothing came out.

He took the keys out from the ignition. He faced her and stared at her with saddened eyes. "I'm going to leave soon," his voice was low.

"You're going to leave? Where? Why?"

"Staying here it's not really home. I don't belong and the longer I stay, the more I feel sad. Everyone puts me down and I get visions and hear things. The more I stay -the more I want to hurt myself - I'm tired of being treated like I'm some monster."

Her eyes flickered. "There's nothing wrong with you."

Jason bit his lip at her. "You know I've done things."

"People make mistakes," she swallowed the lump in her throat. "You know what you did was wrong and you're trying to redeem yourself. Diana isn't perfect. She made mistakes. Just like you. She did things - things she's not proud of but she learned from them and worked on being a better person." She killed people during her first years out into the real world. She killed criminals, rapists, murderers - but they were people still. "And I believe you will do better - redeem yourself."

His hand ran through her hair. She feels him, his skin pressed on her collarbone - slick and warm from sweating. "The only way I can start again is to leave. Being here - there's too many bad memories and I can't go on until I'm away from them."

She hears something - poking in her mind. _There's something - something more - more of a reason why he wanted to leave...-the Joker. He's going around with the Injustice League terrorizing people- and Jason wants to take him. _"I understand," she said without any emotion.

"Go with me," he faced her, his eyes locked on hers.

"What?" she rasped.

"Go...with...me..." he said slower, his face creased from confusion.

Cassie shook her head. There was no doubt about it. She wasn't going to go with him and leave everything in her life. She wasn't going to throw everything she worked hard for. "No I can't. I'm sorry Jason but I can't-

He touched her hand. "Before you say anything, listen to what I have to tell you," his hands gripped hers. "I want you there," his tone was soft. "I want you there with me. You're the only thing that's good in my life - the only thing I don't want to run away from."

She blinked, unable to find anything to say.

"Please say you will," he whispered to her. He brought his fingers to the side of her face, his lips were curved and perplexed. She shuddered from the physical sign of care and adoration. His hand was stroking her, rubbing her skin. They were quiet now, wrapped from the silence of their thoughts. _Say you will. Please say you will._ His words echoed and pierced her skin. Slowly, they were leaning - leaning close to each other. "Say you will. Please say you will," he whispered, tilting his head. "Say...you will."

They kissed each other.

Hands on her face, he's pulling her closer to him. Lips like candy, she's letting him. He's the sweetest thing she ever had. She's moving closer to him - "Jason," she almost whimpered. She feels his hands unbuckling her seat belt - pulling her on to his lap. He does this so quick and haste that the material of the seat belt scraped her skin to a point she was bleeding.

"It's okay," he snaked his hands to her waist. He chuckled, pressing her down to kiss her lips. "A little bleeding never killed anyone."

...

His nibbling her lips, sucking her down like a drink. They were panting. Breathing. Gasping. But they still held on to each other. He's rough - pulling at her hair - biting her lips and throat - his nails sinking into her skin but touching him - tasting his lips and mouth - he tasted unbelievable sweet. Almost like honey. His lips despite chapped and dry, they were somewhat soft. The sensation was so alarming that she breathless, yearning for more of him.

...

She was quiet during the car ride home.

He seemed tense, his body and mind focused on the road, his ears listening to the music on the station he had on.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I can't go."

He licked his lips. "I know."

...

"I'm your martyr," he pressed his lips together against her ear. He was holding her arm, holding her from getting out of his car to get home. "And you're my heroin," she sensed a twinge of possessiveness. "The sweetest painkiller I ever had. I need you."

* * *

"Man you need to cut your hair," Jason sniped. "You look like a freaking girl."

Roy's hair was growing now, becoming shaggy and stringy. He shrugged, adding up another notch to the treadmill. "I don't mind," he shook his hair all over the place out of spite. "I hate short hair. It feels weird. I'm just glad my hair grew back. I will never shave my head again."

"You sound more and more like a girl," Jason laughed. He added more weights on to the barbell. They were exercising at Jason's apartment - his apartment - not the mansion. Unknown to the others he goes back and forth to the mansion, the Cave, and his apartment.

Roy smirked. "Speaking of girls? So how did it go last night? Did she say yes?"

"No," he snapped. He was still upset about it.

"So your charm has finally died out?" he frowned. "Do you want to stay here a little longer-

"No." There was no point. He didn't want to go on with trying to convince her. The more he tried to coax her, the more he felt guilty about it - like it was some sin - as if he was going to rape her or something. The best thing now was to leave her be."We should go along with our plan and leave tomorrow night."

"You sure?" he slowed down and started to jog instead of run on the treadmill. "You waited this long so a couple days won't hurt."

He placed the barbell down and snatched his box of cigarettes from his table. Taking one, he lit it and popped the cigarette into his mouth. "I'm sure."

"What's that sound?"

"It's my phone. I got a text." He took his phone from his pocket and unlocked the screen.

"From who?"

Jason blinked. "Cassie."

...

**Jason: **Cassie,_ do you want this?_

**Cassie: **Yes. :)

**Jason: **Are_ you sure? I'm not forcing you am I?_

**Cassie**: No,_ no you're not and you're not forcing me. I want to go with you._

**Jason**: Are_ you sure?_

**Cassie: **I'm_ sure._

**Jason: **You_ don't know how much it means to me._

**Cassie: **_I know :)_

* * *

They waited for her. Their stuff was all packed and they were waiting for her to change out of her clothes. "Are you sure this is a good idea?" Roy's voice was low. He wasn't oblivious about Jason's thin walls.

"Yeah. I know she will be useful."

"For the team or for your _needs_?" Roy smirked.

"Both."

...

Jason and Roy stood there, frozen, their mouths slightly opened.

"What do you guys think?" she chirped, walking closer to them. She was smiling, unaware of their gaze on her. She was dressed in a black zipper jacket that had an electric blue hood. In the middle of her chest was a white skeleton hand with the anarchy sign over it in blue ink. The jacket was sleeveless to reveal white bandages on her arms and her black and blue striped fingerless gloves. Underneath the jacket, Jason could see a peak of her black tank top. She wore black pants that had two thick, slanted blue color block lines going downwards under her knees and black sneakers. Her hair was braided, off to the side - hidden by the hood she had on. Her eyes were lined in eyeliner and coated with mascara and her lips were the color of cherry black. "I figured to go by a different alias to avoid anyone finding us. Do I look I okay?" she fumbled with her fingers. She's getting flustered again. Jason couldn't help but to smile.

"Y-yeah," Roy became flustered.

"You look more than okay," Jason smiled. He chuckled, seeing her cheeks redden from the flattery. "So what is your new name?"

* * *

**The Night Before**

_"I won't allow it," Diana shook her head. "I'm not going to let my protegee running out with a vigilante and committing crime."  
_

_Cassie bit her tongue. "Diana and Bruce, please listen to me and what I have to say-  
_

_"No," Diana scolded her. "I don't care what you have to say-_

_"Let her talk," Bruce touched Diana's shoulder, holding her in place. _

_"I know it sounds crazy - believe me it is - absolutely- most positively crazy sounding-  
_

_"You're babbling again," Bruce reminded Cassie.  
_

_"Oh," she turned red. "Um I better get to the point should I? I should-I'm doing it again- anyway," she exhaled. "I know he's going to try to escape and continue to take matters in his own hands. And I know he's not going to let the Joker go on in silence. I feel you should let him go and let me go too. What you're doing to him - forcing him to be something he's not - helping him - it's not working. It's only making things worse. My mother once told me that you can't help someone unless they want help from you."  
_

_"What am I supposed to do?" he rubbed his forward. "Let him ruin his life?"_

_"No," she breathed. "I'm saying that the only way right now in helping him is letting him do things on his own. Let him find his way. He's hasn't gotten over dying. He feels nothing. Jason's experiencing symptoms that are similar to the five stages of grief," she said. She knew well about the stages of grief. Wally's death impacted everyone. Loved ones. Friends. Even strangers. "He wants closure. Clarity - something so he can be able to accept what had happened."  
_

_"I'm not going to let him-_

_"I know you known him longer than me but I know him - really know him. Listened to him - what he has to say - how he feels. I know he's a good person deep inside. He's lost right now. Confused. Depressed." Traumatized was the better description. He hears things - in the middle of the night, he would cry - and hurt himself to forget everything. "Despite it, he's still good. I know even when he has the Joker in his hands, I know that Jason won't kill him. And I want to go with him. I want to go keep an eye on him - help him. Please, I know it sounds crazy but I'm the only person he wants to be near. He's still a good person and I know you know it deep inside."  
_

_..._

_"I discussed it with Bruce," Diana patted Cassie by the head. _

_"And what does he say- what do you say?"_

_She went pale. "Through...circumstances, we decided that you should go with Jason but you have to send any report - any progress about him - and tell me about your well...being."_

_Cassie's eyes lowered, seeing Diana's face fall. The feeling - the feeling of leaving her mentor - it felt like when Diana left along the others to be trialed. That was the hardest time for Cassie - to go on without a voice of reason - a mother figure - guidance. "Thank you - I won't be gone too long-_

_Diana wrapped her arms around Cassie. "Just promise me that you won't lose yourself along the way."_

* * *

**_To be Continued..._**

* * *

**A/N: So what should Cassie's temporary vigilante name be? Throughout the story, there will be more character depth and background. Please review.  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

**Chapter Four**

* * *

They've been doing things. Unethical things. Stealing. Intercepting messages and calls. All for one man. Chasing after the Joker when he's a thousands of miles away and have no idea where he is going, it was like chasing after the moon to her. Cassie didn't understand why Jason was so dedicated - put his sweat and tears into the search. Maybe she was never meant to understand. And maybe she could, but she didn't want to.

It disturbed her...how the two of them were so alike.

Roy.

And...

Jason.

Identical almost. Both were quick tempered, over compulsive, obsessive - she wondered why she even was infatuated with either on of them. But then, she remembers, just right now - just like this. They're on the couch in a motel room, watching something mindless on the television set, his arm slung around her neck - her body resting on his chest - and she remembers. Jason, he was kind to her. Despite his past - the things that happened - his downfall, he was kind to her. His strength, his ability - she was fascinated. His pain - she was lured to it - this aura, the way she was once lured to Roy. She was always attracted to the darkness.

Things she couldn't have.

"Are you okay?" he asked bluntly to her, stroking her face. It was late at night. Earlier they came from intercepting messages from the police station and stealing some money from a drugstore, along with food.

"I'm okay," she said. She wasn't. It was a week but she still wasn't used to committing crimes. She did the things - did it without thinking, because she knew she had to go along with it. Robbing owners. Taking down officers. Cassie was cooperative and she always did the job. She closed her eyes and she feels something - he's planting a kiss on her forehead. She doesn't know how or when they've become like this - almost a couple, it just happened. Her eyes fluttered open and she almost sighed. He's sweet, so sweet to her.

Roy cleared his throat and turned his body off to the side, towards the opposite end of the couch. He's uncomfortable and Cassie couldn't blame him. She was always uncomfortable when she was at the Cave and being around couples and being the third wheel. She wasn't really the third wheel, it was more of an eleventh wheel. "I-uh, I'm going to get some beer, do you guys want some?"

"Yeah," Jason said.

"Cass, do you want one?" he asked her.

"Um," she doesn't want to drink. She doesn't. She's opposed to it. "No thanks."

Roy laughed. "No one is stopping you. It's okay, we won't tell," he teased.

She blushed. He liked to tease her - Roy, he liked to tease her on how she was always a good girl scout. Even before, when he was still in the team. "No its okay, I don't want to drink."

He went to the fridge but came back with three bottles of beer. She frowned. She knows he's not going to quit until he gets her to drink. "Come on, Cass," he says as cracked the lids off each beer with the rim of the ratty coffee table. "Did you ever drink before? How do you know that you don't like it until you try it?"

"No, it's okay, really," she pushed the beer away from her.

"Roy," Jason snapped. She feels him, Jason, holding her tighter. "Stop it, she doesn't want it. Leave her alone."

"Okay fine," he shrugged, handing a beer to Jason. Roy sat down on the chair instead. A few minutes later, he's going back to the fridge. It's scary, how he finished drinking the two bottles of beer in only a matter of minutes.

"Don't you think you had enough?" she asked, untangling herself from Jason. She sat up and took the third bottle of beer from Roy's hand.

He shrugged. "Don't know really."

"Cass?" Jason stroked her back. "Are you tired? Do you want to go to sleep?"

"No, I'm fine-

"I think you should sleep," Jason said, tilting her chin up. "You were on watch last night and now it's Roy's turn."

"No-

Roy smirked. "You should listen to your dad, Cass."

She rolled her eyes at him. "I'm fine," her face was red. She hates when Jason does this, being protective over her. "Shouldn't you sleep too?" she teased back at Jason.

He laughed. "Cass, I was dead for years, I think I got plenty of sleep as it is."

"I beat you," Roy added with pride. "I was asleep for eight years."

"You should still sleep," she said regardless to them, the both of them. It's been a week and she doesn't recall them of ever sleeping - like a full night's worth of sleeping - at least seven hours...maybe it's because they don't. Maybe...they don't sleep because they're scared of never waking up and going back to the life.

"Yeah," Roy grinned. "We'll wake you up with a crowbar at the crack of noon."

"Funny," Jason rolled his eyes at Roy. He turned and faced her. "I'll go to sleep but in an hour. I want to relax and drink before I sleep."

"I'm pretty sure sleeping when you're drunk is uncomfortable," she shrugged.

"My body's been affected by the toxins. It takes forever to get me drunk. I'll be fine. You should go march to that bed and sleep."

She opened her mouth but she yawned instead. She was tired, she realized. "Fine," she mumbled to herself in embarrassment. "But promise me that the two of you won't get super drunk."

* * *

There was this sound, this faint - yet distinct sound. Clicking. Pattering. She woke up to the sound of clicking. Roy. She recognizes that sound, he's fumbling with his mechanical arm again. She got up from the bed and stared at the alarm clock. Ten a.m. First, she went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth and brushed her hair before looking for him. She finds him, he's sitting on the kitchen counter top, pressing buttons. It was only him. Jason was gone, it was his turn to look for food. "Morning," she said softly.

"Morning," he says in her favorite voice. He doesn't look at her. His eyes were on his mechanical arm.

"Did Jason sleep last night?" she wondered.

"He slept for three hours."

"Did you sleep?" When it was someone's turn to stay up during the night, they would watch until six a.m. and sleep for a few hours before going on with the new day.

"Yeah," he said.

She propped herself beside him. "You never take off your arm," she says, almost in a plastered statement. He doesn't. He always has it on. "Even when we're not fighting or when it's not your shift to watch over." She knows why he doesn't. She's been analyzing them, their reckless behavior. And she knows that he feels weak and defenseless without it.

"I take it off - when I shower, but other than that, I don't."

Her heart skipped a beat. "Why not?"

Roy stopped touching the buttons and instead he stroked his arm - his limb. "Well," he breathed, his voice lowering. "I guess it feels weird without it."

Cassie nodded. "I see but heads up, I think you're cool with it or without it, either way," she smiled at him.

"I'm -uh, I'm going to shower," he leaped down to the tiled floor. "Do you want to go first or-

"You can go first."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I'll just sit on the couch and watch some T.V." and send communicate with Diana, she wanted to say. She felt horrible, keeping something like this from them. Cassie, she wasn't trying to stop Jason or Roy from coping in their way, she just wanted to be there to help them. The only thing she stood against was them killing. So far she was lucky and they haven't killed anyone - all she needs to do is figure out how to keep it that way.

"Okay."

He comes back, Roy, he comes back to her. The only difference was that he doesn't have the mechanical arm on. He's standing there, looking indirectly at her. "Hey um, can you help me take off my shirt?" he pulled at his hair.

She raised her eyebrow and laughed. She senses something, his hesitation. It was weird, how now he's hesitant around her. He was never before. "Why didn't you take off your shirt before you took out your arm?"

Roy turned red. "Last time I did that I almost shot myself with my arm, remember?" Cassie laughed. She remembered. The other day, after he took a shower, she went in and found burn marks on the floor. "And my real arm is sore from the other day, can you help me take off my shirt?"

"Sure," she stood up and walked up to him. Gently, she pulled up his shirt - he's wincing - and she almost stops but she doesn't and instead, she starts to unroll the material gradually. She almost froze when her fingers brush against his limb, maybe she did. His limb, it was swollen, she couldn't help but to be fascinated. She feels him, she feels him watching her. "There," she said, setting aside his shirt.

"Thanks, I-I better go shower-

There's a sound, the door knob is turning. Jason. She smiled and ran into his arms, making him almost fall backwards. "Hi," she greeted him. Jason smiled and kissed her.

"Good morning."

"Good morning," she said back.

"You're only happy because I brought back food." He showed her the bag of food - she inhaled the scent. Pancakes. Eggs. Bacon. And hash browns. A tray of three coffees in the other hand.

"Maybe," she grinned, kissing him on the cheek.

He set aside the plastic bags and cardboard tray on the coffee table. "I got your favorite, soy latte," he added, sitting down. "Let's eat," he pulled her by the waist and on to his lap.

"Should we wait for Roy?"

"Nah, he's showering and I'm starving." He's already opening one tray and pouring some syrup on his pancakes. They started to eat, sharing a boxed meal together.

"You have some ketchup on the corner of your lips," she giggled, wiping his face with a napkin. She grasped his free arm - the one that wasn't holding her, and she pulled up his jacket and kissed his cuts, his scars. Each cut. Every cut. She always did this - been doing this since they ran away. She always kissed his cuts - with every chance she could in hopes they would heal and remind him that he was loved. The cuts, they were fading slowly. "Promise me you won't cut yourself ever again," she whispered.

"I won't," he stroked her hair, pressing his face close to hers, matching his chocolate brown eyes with her blue eyes. "I have you now. I have no reason to be unhappy anymore."

Blood pumped to her cheeks. She moved back and kissed him. "Good."

"I'm happy you came."

"I know. I'm happy I'm here."

"Man," Roy snorted. He came back, fully dressed and his hair brushed. He has his arm on. "Get a room."

"Sorry, can't help it. Mornings are the only time I can have some time with my girlfriend before shit happens," Jason smirked. It was true, the days and nights they were busy with the chase - finding sources - and late at nights, when they find a new place to stay, they would relax and sleep. Mornings were the only time they had together. "Help yourself to the food. I got your favorite drink, plain black coffee with extra bitterness."

She picked up her fork and fed Jason another spoon of scrambled eggs. "So what's the plan today?"

"I figured we should take a break," Jason said through mouthfuls. "Relax for once. What do you guys think?"

"It doesn't matter to me," Roy shrugged, stacking eggs and hash browns and bacon onto his fork.

"Cassie?" he asked.

"Relaxing sounds nice."

"If we're going to relax," Roy began as he stuff his mouth. "Then we should also have fun." Roy and Jason both crookedly smiled at each other.

Her skin tightened. "What's your definition of fun?"

"We'll finish our food and get ready and then we'll show you."

* * *

_**To be Continued...**_

* * *

**A/N: So there is a little friction with Roy and Cassie. I did that because of in one episode they had a little kiss and probably some interaction and I figure it must be awkward for Roy to see Cassie with Jason. This chapter is a little rest chapter. I didn't want to write an action scene with a hesitant Cassie. I'll write a chapter of an action scene when she's used to doing bad things X) This chapter is a little light because the next chapter is sort of intense and more into the back stories of all three characters. Her temporarily name will be revealed next chapter! Please review!  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

* * *

_"Pills fall like diamonds from my purse,_  
_ Right out the hole in my fur coat,_  
_ Straight down the gutter goes my antidote to a broken girl,_  
_ I promise I'll be the one you want,_  
_ Don't tell me I'm unfixable,_  
_ You don't know what it's like to be seventeen with no place to go,_  
_ But give me just one night and I'll be almost fine,_  
**_ Remind me one more time it's the best days of my life"_**

_- Saturday Night by Natalia Kills_

Broken glass bottles. Ripped out pages. Items scattered all over the ground.

Dead silence.

Hatred was spilling out of each other's mouths.

At each other, like knives cutting open layers of skin and tissue. Muscles and tendons.

"You shouldn't have brought her. It was a bad idea from the start," Roy glared at him and then at her. "I don't need some little child telling me what or what I can't do." His eyes are piercing - his lips are bruised and bloody to match his black eye.

"You were high and drunk!" she snapped. Roy, he was high. He was high and drunk. His clothes were shredded and drenched with blood. He was mutilating himself but he didn't care. "You wanted to go on and tie yourself to train tracks and try to escape before the train came and hit you! I had to do something! I had to stop it before you got yourself killed!"

Roy laughed. "Like you care. You're talking like you actually care for me but you don't," there was bitterness to his voice. "It doesn't matter because you have no right to tell me what to do. You have no right to do anything in this group but be _his_ sex toy. You should have stayed home, _little girl_," his voice was cold.

She frowned and scolded him. "Shut up!-

Jason snatched her by the wrist and yanked her body behind him - as if she was some possession. "Don't you ever talk to her like that ever again," he growled at him through gritted teeth.

Roy scoffed and pushed him. "Or what? What are you going to do about it-

Jason grabbed him by the throat and slammed him to the wall. He's choking him. Smashing his body. Hurting. Hurting Roy - this was his best friend. "Shut your damn mouth before I rip your throat out," he screamed. Cassie went pale and watched in silence. She's never seen him like this - she never seen any of them like this before - so angry - so bitter. So...violent. "You better not talk to her like that again or I swear I'll fucking kill you."

Cassie pulled Jason back. "Jason, stop it," she screamed.

"Not until this bastard gets it."

"I don't care! Let him go," she broke them apart and separated them. "Fighting like this isn't going to lead us anywhere. Roy - I was trying to help - save you from making a mistake-

Roy cackled. "You think that it's the first time I've done it? You're wrong. You don't know _anything_ about me - who I am - or what I've gone through. You don't know what it's like to be frozen for years - to be forgotten - to wake up to a strange world - to lose time and your friends and family. To be stuck like this while everyone you love are different and they are growing up without you - you don't have a right to say anything. You have friends - family - you're loved. So you don't you damn dare say you know what's good for me. You don't know anything about me. And you don't know a thing about him either." Roy turned and crookedly smiled at him. Jason went silent. "Come on Jason, tell her," he taunted, scoffing. "Tell her about everything. This - this is normal - me and him - we get drunk and we get high. And we have _fun_. You think that bungee jumping and skydiving is dangerous? That's only mild by our standards. Some days we would purposely jump down buildings and try to land on top of cars just for the heck of it. We do crazier things. But ever since you're his girlfriend, he's been playing good," he shook his head and laughed. "He's not innocent. He used to go around sleeping with prostitutes and strippers. Not one at a time. In groups."

Color faded from her face.

"Shut the fuck up," Jason growled. "Cassie," he frowned, his voice was full of guilt. "Listen to me-

She didn't want to listen to him because...she knew what Roy was saying was true.

"Why are you with him?" he breathed. It was out now, the main problem. Why he was furious. Why he was channeling so much anger at her and Jason. Her heart skipped a beat to his words, the sound of them - how bitter they sounded. "He doesn't love you. He doesn't even love himself."

"If you're mad at me," she was calm even though she felt like crying. "Then why are you mad at Jason? Why are you angry at him?"

"Because it's his fault," he shook his head, his eyes lowering.

Jason and Cassie's skin tightened. "What are you talking about?" Jason stepped closer. "What did I ever do to you? I've done nothing but been there for you, you're more of a brother to me than Dick. What did I ever do to you?"

No response, just quietness. Cassie's eyes locked on to him, Roy and then at Jason. She felt guilty - Jason, he didn't know. He didn't know at all about it. "Nothing," he finally answered in a calm tone. "Nothing."

...

...

...

**Jason: **He's gone - we should find him - talk to him-

**Cassie: **I should find him. You should stay.

**Jason: **He's my friend - he's like my brother - I need to talk to him-

**Cassie: **I know but he's mad at me and I want to talk to him - one on one- get things cleared.

**Jason: **Make sure he's safe and you're safe. See you soon, Nightmare.

**Cassie: **See you soon, Red Hood.

...

...

...

* * *

She found him, found him sitting on top of a building. He's messing with his mechanical arm, mindlessly clicking and pressing buttons. "Hey," she whispered, slowly sitting beside him.

He didn't look at her but the reaction on his face, it was sad. "Go away," he muttered.

"I'm not going away, I'm going to stay and be here."

No response.

Cassie sighed. "You think that you're the only one who has it bad? You're wrong. I haven't gone through what you've went through but it doesn't mean that I don't know what it's like to be alone and feel angry at everything."

"You're life is perfect," he whispered.

"No, not it's not. My life is messed up, not the same as yours but it's messed up. I grew up without a dad - grew up thinking he was dead. And I grew up very sheltered and protected. I had friends but I was always depressed because I wasn't like them. And I used to think my life was fine - great even, but when I found out about everything -all the secrets my mom kept from me - having powers - my dad," she took a deep breath. "My dad...he's Zeus and my mom kept the secret from me because he... raped her," she closed her eyes. She couldn't imagine what it was like to be raped. To be vulnerable. "And he left her with a child. And...and she didn't want me to be anything like him that she kept me isolated. I'm still trying to find myself but I don't know where to being."

"But you're loved, that's the major difference. People love you."

Cassie wrapped her arms around him and held him tight. He became frozen, and slowly, he molded himself to her. "You are loved but you can't see it." He refused to see it, she knew. She knew he was still hurt. Confused. "They care for you -Ollie - Dinah - Roy - Jason - and I care for you." She moved back, unraveling himself from him.

"It's not the kind of love I want from you, you and I both know that. It's crap. What I'm feeling. What I'm supposed to feel. I'm happy that Jace has someone and he's doing fine but I can't help but to feel like this - empty - hurt - alone. And seeing seeing you and him together - I-I keep telling myself that I'm fine and over that night but I'm not. I know we were never together to begin with and it was months ago but I can't stop feeling what I'm feeling and I hate it. I hate seeing him kiss you - having something I don't have. But most of all, I hate that I'm being a horrible friend - a horrible person but I can't control what I'm feeling."

"I'm sorry - I'm sorry that things didn't work out between us but I'm with Jason now and you can't be mad at him. He didn't know but he cares for you-

"I know," he swallowed. "That's why I never told him about what happened with us. I knew he liked you and I wanted him to be happy but it gets to me," his eyes locked onto hers. "Every time I see you kiss the cuts on his arms- I wish that you would do the same - I wish I could kiss you - hold you - have you."

Her lips trembled as her face became the color of blood. "You're...you're going to find someone Roy - someone that will give you everything you want."

"Do you remember what I told you on that night?" his voice was solemn. Her skin tightened. She didn't want to remember. "I meant it, Cassie, I meant every word."

* * *

_"Cassie," he breathed, his heart beating. He's trailing, trailing behind her while she was walking ahead of him. Away from him. "Cassie," he called out her name again. "Please-_

_"No, she said clearly. "I can't be with you-  
_

_"Why not?" _

_Her eyes lowered. Her face - she doesn't look angry - she looked disappointed. Sad. "Don't tell me that you forgot about leaving the whole entire team in danger-_

_"I went back - I saved them. I went back for you. I saved you. Don't forget that." He feels it - like he's metaphorically on his hands and knees for her. "I know what I did was wrong and I shouldn't have been doing things without thinking but I was scared Cassie. I was terrified of not waking up again but I went back for you. I went back for you despite my fears. Please-_

_She shook her head. "Roy-  
_

_"When I did it- I planned to go back to you - to find you," his hands were gripping hers. "That was the first thing on my mind - to go back to look for you and find you. I didn't care how long it would take, I promised myself to get you back and I did."_

_Color faded from her face. He sounded just like Roy Harper, the clone. She saw him - Red Arrow - saw him - his obsession grow - witnessed him losing his mind - letting everything and everyone go - all for one goal - one person. She doesn't want to be that person - the reason why his life was falling apart. She blinked...the situation. The situation - it was different. She was here. Safe and sound. He's looking at her- her face - just her face. Just her eyes. Looking at her with distress and hope. He wanted to hold on to her, she could feel it. She tries to slip her fingers away but he doesn't let go. His fingers - they're shaking. Along with his body.  
_

_"Please, please, don't end something that never started. There's so much - so much we haven't done - the first thing I want to do is kiss you - your lips - on your mouth. I want to kiss you- please," he whispered. "Let me kiss you."_

_Her eyes lowered to the realization of what she had done - what she had initiated with a simple kiss._

_ He's not going to let her go._

_"Roy-_

_"Cass, please- please," he's practically on his hands and knees. "Please give me a chance- give us a chance, please. I'm not going to give up - I'm not going to give up on us. I want to be with you. I'm not ever going to give up."  
_

_"Roy-_

_"Please, give us chance Cassie. I know you like me - the time you spent with me in the hospital - the Cave - the kiss - you can't deny it. Please, give us a chance."  
_

_She took a deep breath and before she could exhale, there's a relieved smile on his face. "Okay," she whispered. _

_"Thank you Donna, you don't know how much this means to me." It was a slip of the tongue but it meant so much to her.  
_

_Cassie disconnected herself from him, completely. "You called me Donna," her eyes lowered. Donna - the original Wonder Girl - his girlfriend before he was frozen for eight years. Did he like her for her? Or... Did he like her because she reminded him of Donna? Was she his replacement? She didn't want to be a replacement. She never did from the start.  
_

_"I meant to say Cassi-_

_"Are you only interested in me because I remind you of her?" her voice was full of accusation. She heard what happened the second he was saved. He went searching for Donna and begging for her to go back to him but she rejected him. They were ages apart from the years that were taken away from Roy. They were different people. Donna was also engaged. But Roy, he fought for her. He fought for her for a long time before realizing he lost her. Was...was Cassie - was she his replacement? It felt like she was talking to Conner again about M'gann.  
_

_"No- No it's not like that-_

_She shook her head. She didn't want to be someone's replacement. Not again. Not ever again. "I can't. I'm sorry, I just can't."_

_..._

_..._

_..._

It killed him - the mistake he made that night - the slip of the tongue - it had been killing him ever since.

* * *

"I'm sorry for last night and today," he whispered. "I shouldn't have lashed out."

"It's okay," she hugged him. "Just go to sleep okay?" she gave him a slight smile and touched his swollen limb. She stared at it and for a moment, she wanted to kiss his limb to make him feel better. She wished he wasn't sad but she was with Jason and she wasn't going to leave him. "I can't believe you're going to go to sleep without your mechanic arm."

"Well it's just one of those nights, I suppose."

"I guess, night."

"Night."

...

...

...

He's on her bed - Jason. The second he sees her, he sat up and he coaxes her to lay down. "Cassie," his voice was soft. He was stroking her hair. "About what he said-

"I don't care," she swallowed the lump in the throat. It bothered her - of what he did but...she didn't want to leave him. She sees them, the cuts on his arms and she kisses them. She liked kissing them - she liked the way he shuddered when she kissed each cut - the intimacy - the contact. "I don't care about what you did but...do you still do that?" She looked up at him with half lidded eyes.

"No, of course not Cass. Not ever since you're here but I regret it -what I did and I regret not telling you about it," he scooped her body and brought her close to his chest. He kissed the crown of her head and breathed her in. "I promise I will be completely honest with you the way you are with me."

She frowned. ...Honest...She felt like her heart was dying.

"I love you," he kissed her, interlocking his fingers with hers.

"I love you too...Do you think you're going to sleep through the whole night tonight?"

"I'll try. It's not easy for me Cass but maybe we can do an activity together that can help me sleep through the night."

"What kind of activity?"

A crooked smile appeared on his face.

* * *

_**To be Continued...**_

* * *

**A/N: In more detail, Roy and Cassie, it never worked out because Cassie feels that he is using her to get over a pass girlfriend.  
**

**Deleted scene, past scene with the canon kiss:  
**

_Her lips touched his cheek for only a moment, leaving him astonished and in awe. Roy turned and looked at her - there's a smirk on her face - a look of satisfaction. He grinned, meeting her eyes. Bold. Fearless. And her eyes were inviting him. He liked that. "It's a_ start," he responded. He was more than appeased. Grateful was the better term. He pulled her by the back of her shirt and casually, he whispered to her. "After this is over, I want more."

_"More?" she chuckled in amusement._

_"I'm more than happy with the kiss," his voice became smoother. Slower. At ease. "Quite satisfied. Very satisfied. But I can't help to wonder what it's like to kiss your lips - touch them - taste them. Would you give me the honor of doing so later?"  
_

_She smirked. "If you play your cards right."_


End file.
